Astrological Forecast

What's in store for you for the month ahead? Michael looks into the stars to find out.

Here's Michael's astrological forecast for August '07:

AQUARIUS
You are in for a surprise this month. An old flame will burn brightly in August, then fade, then burn again but less than the first time, then fade in lesser degree, then burn but fade in smaller margins still, then either burn or fade - its difficult to tell now. These oscillations will continue to infinity; an abstract ideal like the love you seek.

PISCES
You have been thinking lately that a friend of yours needs to do something about a personal problem they face, but you want to protect their feelings, so you have told all their friends about your concerns, but not them. This is wise, keep up the good work.

ARIES
People are working hard for you, or so it seems until this month you uncover a plot to bring you down. Trust no one until I tell you otherwise.

TAURUS
If you had a nut allergy and were offered a nut bar would you eat it? If you were allergic to stings would you steal honey from the bees? Of course not! Someone is asking something of you which you just cant do, don't feel you need to oblige.

GEMINI
There are domestic issues surrounding you, possibly at home. Tackle them head-on with a touch of unseasonal spring-cleaning. The arrival of the new moon is making something in your refrigerator go off. Its in a jar or container towards the back, a bit to the left.

CANCER
Love is in the air for all cancerians this month. If you are in a relationship, a new air of romance will blossom between you and your partner. If you are single, you find yourself looking to start a meaningful relationship. If you are single, female and attractive, call me.

LEO
Someone from the past will contact you about liposuction, but this may not happen. You will now wonder what became of Mindy from Mork and Mindy, what is she up to these days? You find it difficult to concentrate at present, making the remainder of this forecast largely redundant.

VIRGO
For a while now you have been aware that there is a gulf between your views and the views of the average politician. Health standards have declined, crime is on the rise and foreign policy has brought trouble. All this hasn't overly bothered you, but now they have banned you from smoking inside and that's broken the camels back. It is your destiny to stand up for smokers rights. Your supporters lack the fitness to march on parliament so a 'sit in' is the best option here.

LIBRA
Soon you will have an erotic encounter with a mysterious stranger - possibly ginger - who carries a surprising secret. They are either a millionaire or an STD carrier. Here the stars offer no further clarification. Write in, let us know which it was.

SCORPIO
A close friend is keeping something from you. They are secretly a werewolf. You will have your suspicions, but never be able to prove it. If you challenge them they will fervently deny it, possibly even laugh at you. Don't be embarrassed, your instincts serve you well. To be safe, only travel by day.

SAGITTARIUS
Money worries are holding you back. And 'why?' you should ask yourself, an hour of watching day time television would seem to suggest there are plenty of companies willing to give you money. Get a higher paid job or a source of credit. Do not steal. Follow your dreams.

CAPRICORN
This month sees frustrations at work. Some people aren't pulling their weight and expect you to shoulder the load. Air your grievances through song. Take time for yourself, relax.

MORE STARS NEXT MONTH...

Got a question? Ask Michael